Last night I went to school: Bee School. My friends, Donna and Kelly, went too. We were there to learn about how to raise bees for honey. I have been raising bees for going on 5 years, Kelly just finished her first year and Donna is being sucked into the vortex. I tend to have that effect on Donna: the 4H vortex, the fair vortex, and this summer she was finally sucked into the homeschool vortex. Well last night she paid me back: she tried to kill me. Twice.
The first incident involved an ambulance which was trying to pull out from a side street. We had to stop suddenly to allow him to enter the main road. I didn't think it was an attempt on my life until I saw her accomplice in the rearview mirror coming in too fast. He/She did manage to stop before causing Kelly (in the seat behind me) to become intimately knowledgable with my head.
Donna and are a fun loving group. I think Sam's words when he was told that she and I would be carpooling were: "You and Donna, in a car, together, for an hour? Oh boy!" Kelly is a bit more quiet and reserved. We'll pull her in to our vortex soon enough. It is a 4 week course. We have time.
I digress. We arrived at UCONN for our class. Donna and I joke, tease and have a good time introducing ourselves to the people around us. The woman behind us, we discover, is also a homeschoooler. The guy next to her has 3 Kiko goats in Florida. (??? that is another story in itself!) The guy in front of us has 4 and 6 year old children and is looking into homeschooling. Kelly actually has the homeschool group business cards to hand out! The woman is scary with how organized she is.
During the mid lesson break, they have coffee and cookies for us. I am happily drinking my coffee when Donna made her second attempt on my life. She waited until I had just taken a sip and then she said something funny. I was trying so hard to NOT spray the guy in front of me and yet remain breathing. So Donna suggests to guy he might want a raincoat. He doesn't even crack a smile. This causes me to laugh harder, still with coffee in my mouth! I finally manage to swallow but in the process also inhaled enough coffee into my lungs to cause me to choke, gasp sputter, cough, and yes, even drool. All the meanwhile long, DONNA is laughing at me! But her planned failed, I didn't die laughing!
Of course there are 3 more Thursdays of class... maybe next week, I'll drive...
1 comment:
Sure blame me!
I stopped in plenty of time for the Ambulance (of course I had just had the brakes done and was doing a test for efficiency) and as I said next time I won't mention the projectile aimed for us with "OH CRAP WE'RE GONNA DIE". I will just mention to Kelly (who was riding in the back) to lie down across the seat and hang on........(we car pooled in my buggy that should we had been hit would be hard pressed to have been harmed by such a compact bullet, still we would have been shoved a bit).
While you were trying to compose yourself with the coffee incidence, I was humored by seeing for the first time coffee coming from a persons eyes let alone their nose. I find it ironic the gentleman in front of you did not heed the warning about the rain coat. When I asked others about us for the Oxygen and paddles I thought for sure he would have realized the situation and would have vacated! When I saw the drool I knew you were going to live, Kelly however may have lost a few years off her life and was very concerned.
Poor Kelly. She was associated with us and she even offered gas money. Kelly, as I said, I should probably pay you having survived a night out with these girls.
As we had waited to leave the classroom and finally rose to leave since we expected to see the room empty I was a bit shocked to see the room still full and people staring at us. It must have been Kellys' beauty because most of the people were staring at us.
Go figure........
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